The Boot of All Evil…

The Boot of All Evil…

3 December 2015

Do you ever know what is just right without knowing exactly why?

I have been in the market for new hiking boots as of late. Well, not that I hike about much at this stage of the weather, but my left knee is killing me and I am half tempted to think my orthotics could stand to be renovated. I have spent inordinate amounts of time and effort slaving over what I need, what I want, black or brown or gray or even teal (I know, right??), how much am I willing to shell out for these new foot wonders… It’s tough to pick out shoes anymore. There are way too many choices and colors and profiles – even laces are a major element. And so I cautiously waded into these murky waters alone and unassisted. Here I am, a North East Coast dweller facing the harsh reality of Old Man Winter – And no one seems to want to sell me sturdy hiking boots. They all seem to feel that I must be joking. So… here are some super cute, very trendy, lace up to my KNEES boots for $450 that may be just what I was looking for. Wow.

After striking out miserably, I digress over to the men’s section of boot-wear and lo and behold – the ANGELS sing over there! But only if my dainty size 7 women’s foot can become a men’s size 5 and then, only if they carry that miracle of a size, which they do not. The smallest they carry starts at an 8. Then why did they even tell me this in the first place? I am then carrot-led over to the boys section. Except I do not want superman snow boots. Next step: involve my spouse. He is a good sport about my rants. He even takes me on a date night to a local Outlet Mall, holds my hand romantically from store to store – but waits for me up by the exit door as I advance to browbeat the local HS student turned shoe expert about my wants and needs. Store after store, he patiently and attentively listens to my weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth. In the end there is absolutely no sign of progress and he treats me to a fabulous and perfect dinner of ice cream. With toppings. I love that man.

I have now been reduced to online shopping. I love online shopping for some stuff, but boots? We shall see how this pans out…

Dark Dark humor

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